I've always loved the concept of a dead man becoming reanimated by Zeus of all gods, in order to save a beautiful damsal(Zeus's daughter) from the clutches of an evil dude.
Straight up before i begin...who in their right mind fucks with a god's daughter? Your just asking to get an altered ass whooping. Oh hell yeah.
Now let us see just what the instruction book had to say:
You once were a Roman Centurion, a brave warrior who knew no fear. When you died on the battlefield with courage and honor, you thought you would know peace and rest for all eternity.
But when the evil Neff, Lord of the Underworld, abducted the beautiful Athena, her father Zeus searched for a warrior strong and brave enough to rescue her. He chose you... and brought you back from the grave! And since you would be battling creatures of supernatural power, Zeus gave you supernatural power of your own.
Within certain of the enemy creatures were magical Spirit Balls. If you defeated those enemies and took the Spirit Balls, you would gain the powers of the Altered Beast... the power to transform into creatures of awesome strengths and abilities!
From man to strongman... to werewolf, weredragon, weretiger and the ultimate, the golden wolfman! You now had the power to do what no man living or dead had ever done before... battle the demons of the Underworld... and win!
In the distance you could hear Athena's cries. Zeus returned you to Earth at the graveyard in which you had rested. Waiting for you were the bizarre, twisted minions of the evil Neff. You began to fight harder than you had ever before... because in your first life your battle cry had been... "Never Say Die!"
Not only does a god resurect this sucker...he resurrects his friend who happens to look just like him, but with a different set of underwear. That is only if u choose 2 player mode in the arcade...i don't recall there being a two player mode on the Sega Master System nor the Genesis version. Someone will digress. But not me.
I remember first seeing this game in a local Chuck E. Cheese...i believe it was for someone's bday...and back thn it was one of the games to play. So, begins my bitter rivalry with this game...
Here i am trying to clear this game...and bam bam argh...i die. Stupid muscle man can't even jump and duck with grace.
Back in the days i chose a Sega Master System (SMS) instead of the fabled Nintendo Entertainment System (NES) [their crappier version is above]. So, low and behold my cousin Shaun, also a proud owner of the SMS purchases this game as it is an arcade classic!!!...plus i would now be able to practice and maybe pass the game.
Shaun is a natural at this game...clearing it within a few weeks...so he lets me borrow the game for a bit after i lend him Zillion 2...and low and behold...i still suck at it.
I'd get spirit ball after spirit ball and morph into strong homo man and whatever altered beast it was...usually only the werewolf but if i was lucky i'd become a dragon...and if the videogame gods were merciful...i'd make it to the 3rd level and become a weretiger...i've only become a weretiger like once in my videogame life.
Oh and the trauma continues...
As was the tradition whn we slept over at each others house back thn, we would stay up and watch American Gladiators (show where two "combatants/contestants" battle through cool obstacle courses against various Gladiators like Nitro, Ice, and Tower"). Anyhow, the point of this flashback is that this is where i first saw the commercial for the Sega Genesis...and the kid in a colussem lookin so proud that he can play w/the Genesis and us at home had to wait...but low and behold...Genesis came packaged with...MY FAVOURITE GAME!!! yes thats right folks...ALTERED FUCKING BEAST!
That could be the reason as to why I ended up waiting a few years for the Super Nintendo Entertainment System (SNES)...where Altered Beast could no longer haunt me. Oh the great RPGs that system produced...oh yeah back to AB.
So i thought AB was outta my life for good...WRONG. My bud blineguy downloads a genesis emulator and altered beast. *shrug* Well while waiting for that dude to take a shower and get ready so we could chill at the mall, he left me alone to play this game on his computer...and the memories came flooding back...
Try the game for yourself here feel my frustration.
Shit i really hate that game. Glad someone did a parody. :) Didn't anyone else think that this game was a little homoerotic??? Even as a homoerotic game it is still hard...14 years of altered frustration. Toss this game and give me Shinobi please.
PARODY IS HERE.
Werebear says, "Only you can prevent forest fires...and only you can click the link below to visit Ravenloft's Shinobi review.
Well hopefully i've resurrected your memory...and you'll give Altered Beast a try and form your own opinion, or maybe you too will have years of frustration placed upon you. [sucker]
